… about women and sex.
I was reading Cosmo today when I ran into this book, Sh*t My Dad Says, that actually started out as a twitter page owned by Justin Halpern. I was reading the excerpts that the magazine had and decided that I totally have to have this book. Its hilarious. Just read and enjoy:
On friendship: “You’ve got good friends. I like them. I don’t think they would fuck your girlfriend, if you had one.”
On getting dumped by my first girlfriend: “Listen, I understand why you’re upset, but you’re both 19. You can’t think you were only gonna screw each other forever. That’s just silly talk.”
On furnishing one’s home: “Pick your furniture like you pick a wife. It should make you feel comfortable and should look nice, but not so nice that if someone walks past it, they want to steal it.”
On my trip to Europe: “I know you think you’re going to get all kinds of laid. It’s not a magic place, it’s the same as here. Don’t be stupid.”
I totally want to meet this guy. I would never stop laughing.