an abnormal fear of spiders.
According to dictionary.com that is the definition of being arachnophobic. Now if I was the person that got to decide what words mean my definition would be more like:
an abnormal, paralytic, make-your-heart-stop-beating, I-just-wanna-die-and-I-can’t-breathe fear of spiders.
At least that is how I would classify my fear of spiders. Just listen to this:
Yesterday I was being a good little student by going to school even though I didn’t have a lecture, just to study. I sat down in the library place, got my computer out and decided that it would be nice to check how much money I had in my account. So I open the second patch on my backpack to get out my bank-thingy-mabopper, and guess what was sitting there looking at me. You guessed right. The biggest, fattest, hairiest, ugliest spider I have seen in a long time, and it was in my fucking backpack. Needless to say I was paralyzed and couldn’t breathe for what felt like forever, but then I came to my senses and walked out. I was lucky I had my cellphone in my pocket because I never even thought to grab it. I sat down on the emergency stairs when no one was and quietly had a panic attack. When I could finally breathe again and had stopped crying, I called my roommate. She walked over from her school to get it out and kill it, while I sat in the hallway and freaked the fuck out. After that I didn’t want to be at school, or at home because that’s where it presumably came from, so I went to her school with her to study.
Goodness gracious, I get the chills just thinking about it. And the icing on the cake was that I didn’t get any sleep because I kept having nightmares about spiders attacking me. So not cool. My mom says I should go to therapy for it, but I’m afraid they will make me look at spiders and I’ll die of a heart attack.
I’d rather be alive and arachnophobic than dead at 20.