Fetish Part II

I mentioned once in another post my obsession with tatoos.

I think they are amazingly awesome. For most people they tell some kind of story. They have a specific meaning.

The people who just gets tatoos on a whim are retarded in my mind, but that’s a rant for another day.

Back to my point. I love tatoos. Specifically I love Ed Hardy style tatoos.

A lot of people think they are too violent, kind of emo and shit like that. But I think they are captivating.

They almost always have vibrant colors that you can’t help but admire.

Take for example this pair of Ed Hardy shoes (I didn’t buy these exact ones, but a pair almost like these).

His talent is unending.

I do have to admit that the whole “Love kills slowly” is a bit depressing, but to each his own.


I don’t need you or your brand new Benz

Kesha said it best:

“You can’t imagine the immensity of the fuck I’m not giving about your money and manservant at the mansion you live in. And I don’t want to go place where all my ladies can’t get it. Just grab a bottle, some boys and take it back to my basement, and get sleazy. Sick all your lines, so cheesy. Sorry daddy, but I’m not that easy.”

Listen up dudes, cause not all women are gold diggers. You dropping cash like it grows on trees just makes you look like a douche. Its not all about the benjamins. Sometimes its better to just get sleazy.

When a heart breaks, no it don’t break even

I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing
Just praying to a God that I don’t believe in
‘Cause I got time while she got freedom
‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t break
No it don’t break, no it don’t breakeven, no
What am I gonna do
When the best part of me was always you
And what am I supposed to say
When I’m all choked up and you’re okay
I’m falling to pieces, yeah
I’m falling to pieces, yeah
I’m falling to pieces
(One’s still in love while the other one’s leaving)
I’m falling to pieces
(‘Cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t breakeven)

Sh*t My Dad Says…

… about women and sex.

I was reading Cosmo today when I ran into this book, Sh*t My Dad Says, that actually started out as a twitter page owned by Justin Halpern. I was reading the excerpts that the magazine had and decided that I totally have to have this book. Its hilarious. Just read and enjoy:

On friendship: “You’ve got good friends. I like them. I don’t think they would fuck your girlfriend, if you had one.”

On getting dumped by my first girlfriend: “Listen, I understand why you’re upset, but you’re both 19. You can’t think you were only gonna screw each other forever. That’s just silly talk.”

On furnishing one’s home: “Pick your furniture like you pick a wife. It should make you feel comfortable and should look nice, but not so nice that if someone walks past it, they want to steal it.”

On my trip to Europe: “I know you think you’re going to get all kinds of laid. It’s not a magic place, it’s the same as here. Don’t be stupid.”

I totally want to meet this guy. I would never stop laughing.

Some people make the world special just by being in it.

These people make my world special every day since I’ve met them.

I love them all dearly (all for different reasons), and I’m happy to say they are in my life.

If you don’t know these people, be jealous. Very jealous. These are people that mean something.


 The daddy:
I’m a complete and total daddy’s girl. He’s the best man I know. Even when me makes me mad he can make smile, and that takes  a lot. I love him more than anything, even with his disastrous style. Hehe.


The  mommy
I’m a total mommy’s girl too. She’s strict, stubborn and it’s her way or the highway, but I love her for it. She doesn’t like my lip ring or that I dye my hair, but she accepts me as I am and loves me more than life. Can’t argue with that. I love her more than words.




The sister:
Our fights are almost always World War III, but underneath it all we really love each other. She’s my teacher, my shrink, my personal press agent and my defense attorney. She’s an awesome sister.
No we are not twins. Not even close.



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The niece and nephews:
The cutest kids in the universe. They are hyper and crazy and love attention. I love getting the phone call when they ask me to come visit, and the when I get there the first thing they say is “Hi, do you remember who I am?” hehe. Like I could forget them.



My skank-betch:
The best of the best of friends. She’s a bitch and she knows it. I love that about her. She tells you how it is, not how you want it to be. I’ve known her since I was a little kid and there’s never a dull moment when we are together. By far the best friend anyone could have ever!




My double:
We are essentially the same person, or as close to that as possible. We think the same, react the same, talk the same, love the same things. She tells me when I’m being a bitch, and I can tell her too. Not ocean could keep us apart as long as we have AIM to text on. I love her more than I love pink!




 My piratehooker:
My hyperactive, spastic bestie. No matter if we are pulling all-nighters, drinking Monster like its going out of style, stealing ice cream from her sister, sneaking out or tp-ing people’s house, we are always having a blast. I swear over the years I have lost like 50 lbs just laughing with this girl. I love her dearly.


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My opposite
We are polar opposites, but that’s why we work. She’s shy, nice and conservative. I’m outgoing, kind of a bitch and will tell you what I think. We love each other anyways no matter what.



The roomies:
Living in Bergen wouldn’t be the same without these girls. They’ve seen me at my best and worst, and love me anyways. Couldn’t ask for better roomies!



My favorite person ever, my grandma. I miss her everyday, but we had a good run together. She was always on my side and made me feel special. I can’t put into words the impact she made on my life, but I hope that one day I can be even half the grandma that she was for me.